“In Chicago the incentive is ‘commit chaos, get a sternly worded tweet and maybe a juice box.’ In Florida the incentive is ‘try that nonsense and you’re learning criminal procedure from inside a cell.'”

“His house burned to the ground, his neighbors died across the street, and now he’s living in a trailer — yet Karen Bass has the audacity to accuse Spencer Pratt of *politicizing* the fire her administration turned into an inferno.”

“In Thailand, even your bow is a status symbol — too deep and you’re announcing peasanthood, too shallow and you’re an arrogant foreigner. It’s basically your LinkedIn profile picture, except everyone judges it in real time.”

“If voluntary exchange is theft, then Beyoncé didn’t just ‘earn’ a fortune — she apparently shook down the entire planet with glitter and synchronized choreography. Did Queen Bey ‘steal’ her billion, or did LeBron and Jordan?”

“In Chicago the incentive is ‘commit chaos, get a sternly worded tweet and maybe a juice box.’ In Florida the incentive is ‘try that nonsense and you’re learning criminal procedure from inside a cell.'”

“His house burned to the ground, his neighbors died across the street, and now he’s living in a trailer — yet Karen Bass has the audacity to accuse Spencer Pratt of *politicizing* the fire her administration turned into an inferno.”

“In Thailand, even your bow is a status symbol — too deep and you’re announcing peasanthood, too shallow and you’re an arrogant foreigner. It’s basically your LinkedIn profile picture, except everyone judges it in real time.”

“If voluntary exchange is theft, then Beyoncé didn’t just ‘earn’ a fortune — she apparently shook down the entire planet with glitter and synchronized choreography. Did Queen Bey ‘steal’ her billion, or did LeBron and Jordan?”