Ladies and gentlemen, behold the glittering pinnacle of modern corporate achievement: Angie Báez, former JPMorgan Chase Executive Director and Professional Equity Evangelist, caught on camera turning a Manhattan sidewalk into her personal garbage disposal unit.

This absolute legend didn’t just litter—she executed a flawless trash heist. She dumps an entire Knicks-themed public trash can onto the street like it’s confetti at her own parade, then waltzes off with the can itself because… you know, entitlement. She’s a DEI officer after all, she hands out unearned entitlement daily; it’s her job. Of course it’s going to infect her mind.

Meanwhile, while the rest of us are out here paying taxes and pretending not to notice the rats throwing block parties in the remaining filth, Angie was living her truth: “The rules are for thee, but this limited-edition street furniture is for me.”

And what a truth it was. This wasn’t some minimum-wage summer intern having a bad day. This was a high priestess of the DEI temple—previously leading diversity efforts, now in “community engagement”—pulling down $200k to $400k+ in total compensation. That’s not a salary; that’s a shareholder-funded subscription to lectures about how the rest of us need to do better, be better, understand that people of color get unearned privilege and get run roughshod over common decency and our individual rights, and that we dare not complain. A walking, talking corporate diversity tax with fat ass legs. She spent her days scolding the public about systemic this and unconscious that, then treated New York City like her personal litter box the second Knicks fever hit.

Now contrast this masterclass in civilized behavior with Japan. After a baseball game in Tokyo, the fans don’t riot, don’t loot the stadium gift shop, and don’t leave the place looking like a landfill exploded. No. They stay behind and clean. They pick up every last piece of trash. The stadium is spotless. The streets are spotless. Social cohesion so thick you could spread it on toast. Order. Decency. The radical notion that public spaces belong to everyone, so maybe don’t treat them like your goal is to reintroduce the black plague by helping swell the city’s rat problem.

And by rat problem I mean people like her, and by plague I mean the proliferation of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion and “wokeness.”

One society produces viral videos of entitled executives stealing trash cans while rats the size of house cats feast like it’s Thanksgiving. The other produces people who instinctively make shared spaces better. One breeds plague-adjacent rodents and “how is this my problem?” energy. The other breeds safety, trust, and the quiet dignity of not being a walking biohazard.

Which one survives in the long run? The one where adults act like adults, not the one running a permanent participation-trophy experiment in lowering standards for the sake of “equity.” Merit, accountability, and cultural norms that shame bad behavior beat grievance Kabuki and race-conscious hiring every single time. History is littered with the corpses of civilizations that decided competence was optional.

JPMorgan did the bare minimum and fired her after it went viral—congratulations, you contained one PR dumpster fire. But the real cleanup needed is the entire rotten, government-pressured apparatus that elevated this mindset in the first place. Until companies stop treating “Diversity Executive” like a real job title instead of expensive corporate fan fiction, we’ll keep getting more Angies: who posture as our moral superiors, but in practice, literally spread their inner trash everywhere.

Me? I’d rather live in the society that polices its own trash than the one that needs a camera crew to police its executives. At least the Japanese version won’t spread their filth while calling you the problem